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What is this place?


What is this place,
Of sorrow, pain,
Grief, disbelief?
Where tears are my constant companion,
At every thought, memory,
At every little reminder.

What is this place?
Where others lives go on
But mine has been turned upside down.
Where I have to be so strong
Just to stop from falling apart.

What is this place, Lord?
Where I am gripping so tight on to you
But still I am sinking
Like Peter trying to walk on the water,
And I am so close to drowning.

What is this place?
Where I am trying so hard
To make some sense of the past
As if explanation will make it go away.
But nothing can take the past away.

What is this place
Of anger, of sheer frustration
Why am I still here?
Can’t someone else
Have a go at this
For a while?
Why me, Lord?

Why not?
Sometimes I know the answers.
I know you are there Lord
In this place.
I know you felt all this and more
In Gethsemane.
Betrayal, abandonment,
You had to be strong too,
Though you wept tears like blood.

Here is the place
Where you were sad and troubled
Where you prayed and prayed
‘Take this cup away’
But when you looked up
It was still there.

To be honest Lord
Sometimes it is small consolation
To know you have been there.
It doesn’t take the pain away,
It doesn’t stop me
Wanting to just curl up
And weep and weep.

But this is the place where I am
And you are there with me
And that will have to do.

© 2003 – EC – Church Family Member – Published by All Saints Church with permission

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